The Olympic closing ceremony displayed the very best of British music, fashion, and police crowd control techniques.
Whilst Elbow performed “Open Arms” and “A Day Like This”, the Metropolitan Police Kettling Display Team (or PoKeDiT, as they are better known) showed how to effectively shackle and detain over five thousand of the World’s fittest youths using the “Kettling” technique first seen during last year’s Student Tuition Fees demonstrations.
Kettling, for the uninitiated, is a technique used by police to dampen the spirits of large numbers of people. Coincidentally a similar effect can be obtained by listening to music by The Spice Girls.
The fact that the World’s fastest and the World’s strongest men were unable to breach the police cordon and flee the stadium whilst The Spice Girls performed two numbers is a testament to the police containment skills on show. The Chinese authorities in particular rose as one to applaud this demonstration of superior force at the climax of the show.
Brian May then followed a video clip of Freddie Mercury by playing his Brighton Rock solo. Mercifully truncated, perhaps it is about time that someone pulled him to one side and told him that his solo was always the least interesting part of any Queen gig? Thirty three years on from the Live Killers album, he was lucky it wasn’t the least interesting part of the Olympics Closing Ceremony. Fortunately for Brian, he was up against some pretty stiff competition for that particular honour (despite the many fantastic moments the ceremony also offered, it should be said).
In other news, Guns n Roses have announced a Las Vegas residency with a twelve show stay at the Hard Rock Hotel during October and November. Given Axl’s fondness for coming onstage late, expect those dates to creep into December…
Record #82: The Kinks – Waterloo Sunset